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You already know this, there is nothing easy about infertility, but my hope with this blog is to highlight some of the notable, positive outcomes that I have seen derive from our infertility journeys. The phrase, “I am woman, hear me roar!” has always made me laugh, especially within moments of my own life that I was able to use it. After I successfully installed a new light in my hallway, I flipped the switch and gave a little celebratory shout when the light came on. When I ended an emotionally abusive relationship, I remember feeling the small flicker of strength, despite the tears that came and were hard to stop. Some of these times were little moments in life, others were momentous occasions or difficult situations to overcome, but that feeling of strength was always there to hold onto. In my own life, infertility has not affected me individually, but has been a struggle for many of my loved ones. While I cannot directly relate to the battles that you have gone through, I want to focus on what I have seen with each of the women I know in this community, which I’m sure is the same for women and couples everywhere. I may use that phrase lightheartedly throughout my life, but I see you all as the ones having the stronger internal “roar” that I wish to honor. The first aspect being that I am amazed by is your strength and resiliency. You truly astound me with your capacities to handle such a personal and intimate struggle with grace and endurance. I’m sure there are times when it feels like you have nothing left to give, but despite feeling lower than low, you don’t quit. I hope that you all can feel that strength inside of you when you’ve lost count as to how many shots you’ve had, how many times you’ve felt inadequate, or how many times you’ve hated your body; I hope you continue on and continue to hold onto that resiliency that amazes me. While it should not have surprised me, I was also so impressed with the different networks of support that are a part of this community. With my own life struggles, the best remedy was being able to rely on those loved ones around me that could empathize and sympathize with me; I am thrilled to see such a large network available for this community as well! I have loved getting to see the many resources available for those affected by infertility, but also how many community members have been a source of support for each other. Especially during the impact of the COVID-19 virus when we may be feeling more isolated and alone, your empathy and camaraderie continues to be a strong and notable presence. It would be easy (and justifiable) to feel downtrodden and closed off throughout the long haul of infertility, but I have seen so many of you open your hearts to others with kindness and love. You truly are amazing women, and I hope you never forget the inner “roar” that you have. Written by: Sara Johnson

They say to GO FORWARD and NEVER LOOK BACK, but seeing that 2020 has been a crap shoot, let's look back at the best infertility blogs of 2019. Jessica Timmons wrote an excellent post on Healthline Parenthoood, listing all the best blogs specifically in regards to infertility. These women come from all walks of life and tried many different avenues to get pregnant, some were successful and others were not. They share their trials, methods, hopes, fears, joys & triumphs. We might all have our own story, a different version of infertility, but let us always remember that we are never alone through this journey. Jessica states it perfectly, "Infertility can feel like a hopeless sentence for people dreaming of having a baby. But the support and camaraderie of people who are going through the same struggle can offer valuable perspective. In compiling this year’s best infertility blogs, we looked for the ones that are committed to educating, inspiring, and empowering people during their infertility journeys. We hope you find insight, hope, and comfort here." Here is the list: A Cup of Jo Joanna Goddard, the founder and namesake of the enormously popular blog A Cup of Jo, writes with grace and warmth about her own infertility journey. It’s just one topic on this varied blog, which also covers style, design, food, travel, relationships, and motherhood. Trials Bring Joy Chelsea and Josh weathered close to 10 years of infertility treatments before welcoming their twins in May 2017, and Chelsea captured the highs and lows of their journey on her blog. She says the infertility community runs deep in her heart, and this little family’s story is a powerful reminder that some things are worth waiting for. Dreaming of Diapers This tell-all infertility blog is authored by a self-professed “Southern girl” and her husband, who have been trying to conceive for the last five years. In posts that are heartbreakingly honest, she chronicles every step of the journey — from “finding out my potential surrogate could not grow her lining past 5 mm for an entire year” to “recognizing depression, after depression.” Her blog and life can be summed up beautifully in the quote, “The struggle is part of the story.” Stirrup Queens Melissa and her husband have twins who were conceived via fertility treatments, and they’re trying to grow their family. She shares her experience with infertility and conception on her blog, where visitors will find information relating to diagnoses, surrogacy, treatment options, helpful guides, medications, tests and surgeries, and loss. Our Misconception Candace and Chris have been trying to conceive for more than six years, and have an intimate understanding of the isolation and sense of loss that comes with infertility. That’s why they’re sharing their story. In doing so, they hope their experiences may soften the learning curve for others navigating the same road. The couple shares openly, bravely, and with a hint of humor in passages like this one: “Infertility, it turns out, is more like trying to fish in The Sahara. You have all the tackle (snicker snicker) and see everyone else catching fish, but all you get is dry clumps of sand.” Amateur Nester A blog devoted to “Christian encouragement during infertility,” Amateur Nester does a great job of detailing the emotional, physical, and financial aspects of infertility. Lisa and her husband Tom went through multiple rounds of testing and treatment before welcoming their first little girl, and they paid for it all out of pocket. The blog also has content for the newly diagnosed, encouragement to keep people going, information about IVF, and much more. Life Without Baby After five years of writing her way through her infertility journey, Lisa Manterfield stopped skirting her deeper issues and emotions and came to terms with a future that wouldn’t include biological children. She wrote a book and started a blog, which has become a haven for other women trying to make peace with a life that didn’t include physically giving birth. This is a safe and support-filled place for conversation and compassion. Eggsperience As the name implies, this is a resource for all things egg freezing. The information is intended to inspire and educate women about oocyte cryopreservation by serving as a roadmap complete with extensive medical information for navigating the fertility journey all the way to motherhood. The blog shares guides and personal stories about egg freezing to offer a range of perspectives. Waiting for Baby Bird Elisha describes her infertility journey as a bumpy path full of twists, turns, and surprises. Now a mother through adoption, she continues to offer support and resources for other women navigating infertility and miscarriage. Elisha leans heavily on her faith, and her ability to see the bright side in everything is truly inspiring.

Mother’s Day… a day many women look forward to for a chance to be recognized for all the hard work and dedication they put into their families. A day of gift giving, food consuming, and if the weather is good (and we’re not in the middle of a pandemic), spending time outdoors with family. It’s such a nice, appreciated day for many. But what about the rest of us? What about those of us who aren’t mothers but so desperately want to be? Those of us who have gone through multiple blood draws, poked ourselves daily with needles piled with hormones, or all the procedures and surgeries to try to get pregnant? Not to mention thousands of dollars spent pursuing said treatments or adoption. For any of you in ANY of those situations, we know Mother’s Day can be one of the hardest days of the year. Feelings of anger, sadness, hopelessness, and loneliness replace any good feelings that might be felt. So, how can you get through it? Here are some suggestions: Give Yourself Permission To Say “No.” This year it will actually be easier to avoid parties because of the social distancing situation, but if you do get an invitation to go somewhere, remember it’s ok to say “NO” and spend the day at home. You can find another way to honor your own mother without putting yourself in such a vulnerable situation by asking to spend time, just the two of you on another date. This idea can also apply to church or other social gatherings. If gatherings are unavoidable, plan and prepare ahead of time. What are family members likely to say? Who is going to ask the awkward questions? How would we like to respond? Can we arrive late/leave early? Discussing these things with your partner and planning ahead of time can make the situation more manageable. Plan Some Self-Care Time. This Mother’s Day may not be ideal for you, but what are some ways it could be better? Plan an All-About-ME/self-care day/weekend. Make a list of what YOU want to do and make it happen. This could include taking a bubble bath, going for a hike, reading a favorite book, staying in jammies all day, spending quality time with your partner, or watching 6 hours of Netflix! Whatever it is, do something that makes Mother’s Day a day filled with more of what you want. Focus On Your Mother (Or Another Woman You Admire) And How You Want To Honor Them. Taking the focus off of yourself and thinking of ways you want to serve or give to your mother is a good way to take your mind off of your current situation and give back to others. Try to think of something fun you could make or something that would be meaningful to the both of you - maybe a project you have wanted to do but haven’t found the time? Talk To Someone. While it is hard to believe at times, you are not alone in this journey. Find others to reach out to and talk with. This could be a trusted family member or friend, or maybe you know someone else struggling with infertility. If not, remember that UIRC has online Facebook Support Groups you are welcome to join anytime! It is a loving community with people just trying to navigate the family building journey, like you.

Infertility is a rollercoaster at the best of times. Add in lockdowns, job insecurity, and cancelled or postponed cycles and the chaos can throw your emotions and mental health for a loop! Here are a few ways to hold onto hope and find calmness in the chaos: Practice Grounding. When you feel your mind start to spiral and your anxiety rise, practice grounding techniques to bring you back into your body. A simple one is the 5,4,3,2,1 senses activity. Name 5 things you see, 4 things you hear, 3 things you feel, 2 things you smell, and 1 thing you taste. Create a comfort kit. Include a playlist of your favorite songs (you can check out our Spotify list for inspiration), a soft blanket or cozy scarf, your favorite candle or essential oil, and a simple activity like adult coloring books or crochet. Something that can help ease tension. Use online resources. Infertility is already isolating...when you add social isolation it feels doubly isolating! UIRC has moved all of its support groups online as well as adding a weekly online support group that specifically helps anyone with a cancelled or postponed treatment cycle. Our therapists are also continuing to see clients online and educational consults have moved online as well. This is not a journey you have to make alone! Print or write down positive quotes or affirmations to read when you are feeling discouraged. Here are a few you can use: “I am strong mentally and physically. I have all that is necessary within me to make it through this process.” “I am surrounded by healing and love” “I can control what I can and let go of what I can’t” “Courage doesn’t always roar, sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day saying ‘I’ll try again tomorrow’” Preparing mentally for the hardest days can help us weather the storms of infertility and make it through these new challenges.

Join the orange movement today, Wednesday, April 22nd and rock your ORANGE gear to show your support of National Infertility Awareness Week. Wear Orange Campaign was created by RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association to help raise awareness about the importance of empowering you in your journey and changing the conversation around infertility. Whether it’s you, or someone you know who struggles to build a family, Wear Orange. During the week of April 19-25, we encourage you to wear and rock your orange. Orange is an ancient symbol of fertility and combines the color red, a symbol of love, with the color yellow, which signifies happiness. By donning orange and speaking to others about the meaning behind your fashion choice, you open up a conversation about the disease of infertility and motivate those who have been affected to make a greater commitment to the cause. Did you also know that the color Orange promotes a sense of wellness! Emotional energy that can be shared: energy such as compassion, warmth, and passion. It also helps to recover from disappointments from a wounded heart. Studies show that orange can create a heightened sense of activity, a boost in aspiration, contentment, assurance and confidence. So go ahead... Take that Selfie and show your Orange pride! Don't forget to use the hashtags # WearOrange & UIRC, so we can also see your journey through this difficult time. Remember..... We Are Here For You!!!

As you know infertility is common, we just don't talk about it! Did you know that this week is National Infertility Awareness Week!!! The struggle is REAL, so what can we do to help each other and ourselves during this stressful time? Everyone is struggling with this coronavirus, mandates to stay home, no social gatherings, homeschool, businesses are closed and some offices have put off infertility treatments. All of these elements on top of the emotional and physical roller-coaster that we endure with infertility. So what can we do to stay connected and to help cope through this difficult time? The National Infertility Awareness Association has listed some of the following: Wear Orange Join the orange movement on Wednesday, April 22nd and rock your ORANGE gear to show you support of National Infertility Awareness Week®. It can be as simple as an orange shirt or other items like orange socks, orange lipstick, an orange ribbon, paint your nails orange or even go big with a boa! Whatever you chose will be perfect as long as it is… you guessed it, orange. Get Local, virtually Spread a little or (a lot) of infertility awareness to your local community by reaching out to local media and news outlets. Connect with them via social media or an email and tell them about National Infertility Awareness Week® and how this disease impacts millions of Americans daily. Your story can make BIG impact in a small way in your local area. Start by sharing your story, educate the public by talking about this disease, and advocate for the infertility community. 5 Day Photo Challenge Starting Monday, April 20th and ending on Friday, April 25th The National Infertility Association is challenging this community to share a different photo for every day using the hashtags #NIAW2020 #MyInfertilityStory Find or Post a Virtual Awareness Event Search, post or get some really great ideas for a virtual infertility awareness event during NIAW. For example, we at UIRC will be hosting a couple of different events this week. On Monday the 20th, at 8pm we will be streaming the movie "Making Babies", then on Thursday the 23rd of April, Dr. Johnstone will be hosting an LGBTQ event via Zoom. Details will be on our Facebook page. Share your story If we are going to change the conversation, we need to tell our own story in a way that will create change. Become a powerful storyteller. Submit your story to share with us during NIAW and we will choose one to highlight and share on our blog. You can submit your story to us at contactus@uirc.info And there is much much more that is suggested on the National Infertility Association website, go check it out! Hope these awesome tips will help you stay connected during these troubled times. Remember..... You're NOT Alone!

According to the American Pregnancy Association, Infertility is a condition of the reproductive system that prevents the conception of children. It affects approximately 10-15% of couples throughout the United States. The diagnosis of infertility is usually given to couples who have been attempting to conceive for at least 1 year without success. Conception and pregnancy are complicated processes that depend upon a number of factors, including: * Is infertility primarily a woman’s problem? * It is a common assumption that infertility is primarily related to the woman. In reality, only one-third of infertility cases are related to the woman alone. Statistically, one-third of infertility problems are related to men and the remaining one-third is a combination of fertility factors involving both partners or unknown causes. Unknown causes account for approximately twenty percent of infertility cases. What causes infertility in women? The most common cause of female infertility is ovulation disorders. Problems with ovulation affect about 25% of all infertility situations. Other causes of female infertility include blocked fallopian tubes, which can happen when a woman has had pelvic inflammatory disease or endometriosis; Congenital anomalies (birth defects) involving the structure of the uterus, and uterine fibroids which are associated with repeated miscarriages; and aging, since the ability for ovaries to produce eggs tends to decline with age, especially after the age of 35. What causes infertility in men? The most common causes of male infertility are azoospermia (no sperm cells are produced) and oligospermia (few sperm cells are produced). Sometimes, sperm cells are malformed or they die before they can reach the egg. In rare cases, infertility in men is caused by a genetic disease such as cystic fibrosis or a chromosomal abnormality. For men with low sperm count or motility issues, clinically proven supplements are available that can improve sperm parameters. SpermCheck is available with your local infertility clinic. When should someone get tested for infertility? The American Society of Reproductive Medicine recommends that women under 35 begin testing after trying to conceive unsuccessfully for 12 months. The recommendation for women over 35 is to begin testing after trying to conceive unsuccessfully for 6 months. Some couples or individuals find that they are more relaxed when trying to conceive if they believe that everything is normal. How early can you get tested? Couples may request that their health care provider conduct an exam to determine if everything is healthy and working correctly. It is also possible to use over-the-counter screening tests using testing kits to evaluate key aspects of fertility for both men and women. How is infertility diagnosed? As already noted, couples are generally advised to seek medical help if they are unable to achieve pregnancy after a year of unprotected intercourse. The doctor will conduct a physical examination of both partners to determine their general state of health and to search for physical disorders that may be contributing to infertility. The doctor will usually interview both partners about their sexual habits in order to determine whether intercourse is taking place properly for conception. If no cause can be determined at this point, more specific tests may be recommended. For women, these include an analysis of body temperature and ovulation, x-ray of the fallopian tubes and uterus, and laparoscopy. For men, initial tests focus on semen analysis. How is infertility treated? Approximately 85-90% of infertility cases are treated with conventional therapies such as drug treatment or surgical repair of reproductive organs. Assisted reproductive technologies such as in vitro fertilization account for the remaining infertility treatment options.

Shock * Grief * Depression * Anger * Frustration * Hopelessness * Despair * Low Self-Esteem & Loss of Self-Confidence are just a few of the emotions that one feels as they struggle with Infertility. Loosing a sense of control over one's life is normal while struggling with infertility and you are NOT Alone!! That is why we here at UIRC have developed Support Groups to connect individuals sharing this same grueling experience. Each month UIRC offers many peer-led support groups, these groups provide a place for you to share what is going on in your life - the good, bad and the ugly, with those who are also going through or have dealt with these same trials. Each month the group leader picks a topic that we will all discuss for the first 10-15 minutes, we will then turn the time over to group members to share what they are going through. We do a round robin style support group (meaning we pass a talking stick around to each group member). This gives each member the time to talk about whatever they need to share without interruption. After everyone has had the opportunity to share their thoughts we then mingle and have a light snack provided by the group leader. Each support group last about one hour. Support Groups provide a safe setting for those struggling with infertility to connect with others who understand. Finding emotional support on your infertility journey is important. As men are also welcomed to join along, usually one pops in, the majority of time it consists between 4-8 women at each support group. "It's about Women helping Women, and Women doing things together & supporting each other." - Diana Burch. ***Now, more than ever, is a time where we need to support each other through these hard times. As if infertility wasn't hard enough, within a week, all of our lives have been turned upside down. Covid-19, isolation, social-distancing, no toilet-paper, grocery stores are barren and others are loosing their jobs. As there's no certainty in what the future holds, what is certain is the help that our support groups give to those struggling. Usually we meet in person, due to social-distancing we are holding these groups via online. For more information you can join our Facebook groups to see where to attend the online session as each group leader may prefer one chat group over another. For example, if you live in the Salt Lake City area you can join the SLC Infertility Support Group UIRC. Hopefully in the next month or two, we can all return to our normal lives. Here is a list of the 6 support groups that UIRC covers, the locations and times. Support Groups: Meet once a month on the same day of the week. This meetings will resume once the social-distancing is lifted. *Cache Valley - Second Thursday, 7-9 pm 965 S 100 W Suite 103, Logan *Utah County - Fourth Thursday, 7-9pm 1881 N 1120 W, Provo *Salt Lake City - Second Tuesday, 7-9 pm 1565 E 3300 S, SLC *Weber/Davis - Second Thursday, 7-9 pm 1825 W 4400 S, Roy *Adoption & Infertility - ThirdWednesday,7-9 pm 1565 E 3300 S, SLC *Pregnancy/Parenting - Last Wednesday, 7-9 pm 1565 E 3300 S, Salt Lake City

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February 7th, 2020 the UIRC participated in the 12th annual Non-Profit Day at the Capital, here is Salt Lake City. It was a day dedicated for non-profits to educate and advocate for their respective organizations. Our team talked to Utah legislators about the impact of infertility on their constituents, upcoming legislative bills that will impact the infertility community and the importance of medical coverage! There were 75 different non-profits that attended the event at the capital. All had the opportunity to spend the day in the rotunda meeting with State Representatives, discussing policies and what our mission and goals are. We also had the chance to meet and network with other non-profits. It was a wonderful opportunity to meet and network with our elected officials here in Utah. It was very rewarding to have the opportunity to educate them about what we do here at UIRC. So many said, "I need to send my (daughter, cousin, son, niece, etc.) to you. They have tried for ten years!" We learned that with effective personal communication, we can properly educate our legislators on why so many Utahan’s need help. They then can vote to make a difference and make a change in the infertility world.

Did you see our program manager, Annie Hamilton on KUTV channel 2 news? In its "Pay It Forward" segment Mountain America Credit Union graciously donated $500 to help us at the Utah Infertility Resource Center with our "Lucky Socks" program. If you missed the special segment, don't worry... You can watch Annie here https://kutv.com/features/pay-it-forward/pay-it-forward-lucky-socks-are-a-bright-spot-for-women-undergoing-fertility-treatments The "Lucky Sock" program gives a free pair of socks to women undergoing fertility treatments. "It connects you to a community that can relate with you," said Alicia Russell. We here at UIRC have donated about 350 pairs of socks to different clinics around the area. These socks are not just donated to those undergoing infertility treatments but also to those who are adopting, with a matching pair going to the birth mom. These "Lucky Socks" not only keep your toes warm, but they also warm the cold thoughts of loneliness. The majority of us here at UIRC have all in one way or another have struggled with infertility and we are here to help you. Today Annie would like to share her journey with infertility and her thoughts about our Lucky Socks program; "In my fertility journey, I was very lucky in that I had an aggressive OB/GYN. After just 6 months of trying to get pregnant, she wanted to do some testing. After several months of blood work and being on Clomid, she referred me to a Reproductive Endocrinologist. This doctor believed I had endometriosis, something I had always suspected due to the different issues I had during my period (extremely heavy bleeding and pain, sickness, bloating) and we decided to do a laparoscopy to investigate further. My doctor removed several endometrioma (endometriosis filled cysts) and other scar tissue, in addition to discovering that my ovaries were adhered to my uterus. Even after removing the endometriosis, we decided IVF was the best course of action to take because it was so severe. I got pregnant with my son (now 3) from our fresh cycle and then had our daughter (8 months) from doing a frozen transfer. I am so grateful for reproductive technology and how it has helped me grow my family! I think the Lucky Socks program is a great way to let others in the community know that we are here and they don’t have to be alone in their journey. Most people don’t understand the heartache of infertility and something as simple as a pair of socks can help a person feel understood and supported. Again, it’s such a simple gesture but it’s the small things that can have a big impact! We hope through this program others will learn more about our services and the support out there so this journey can be a little less stressful."

From UIRC Therapist, Annie Hamilton Approximately 1 in 8 couples struggle with infertility (RESOLVE, 2019), although some studies show that this number could be higher. With infertility rates going up, it is more likely than not that you know someone who is struggling with infertility (or several people). The stress and grief of infertility can be difficult to understand when you haven’t personally been through it, making it hard to know what to say or how to support these friends or family members. To put things into perspective, Alice Domar, Ph.D has conducted studies that show a woman going through fertility treatments experiences stress levels similar to those of a cancer patient. Keep reading to know what NOT to say and what you can do instead to be a positive support system. What NOT to say to your friend or family member struggling with family building… “Just Relax…” or “Don’t Worry…” You may mean well, but to a person trying to start their family, hearing this statement feels as though you are not taking them seriously. While there is some connection between fertility and stress, it is important to understand that infertility is a medical issue and not something that can go away by relaxing more. Besides, has anyone ever been able to stress less because someone told them to? Any sentence beginning with “At least...” “At least you can sleep through the night,” “At least you have less Christmas presents to buy!” Any sentence beginning with “At least” can be extremely invalidating and is better left unsaid. “It will happen when it’s supposed to.” This statement isn’t very comforting and similar to the “At least” statement, it can feel unsupportive and invalidating. “Have you tried (fill in the blank)?” Usually, a person who opens up about their infertility isn’t asking for advice. Chances are, they’ve already received a lot of unhelpful advice from others and more advice can make the couple feel more stressed. “Maybe you just aren’t meant to be parents.” Ouch! Infertility is already a painful experience that can fill a person with intense amounts of shame (ex. “Why can’t we have a baby? Am I a bad person? What’s wrong with me?”), this statement just confirms to the person that something IS wrong with them. “Why don’t you just adopt?” While adoption is a great option and a huge blessing in many peoples’ lives, it’s also a stressful process and gets expensive (anywhere from $5,000 up to $60,000!). In addition, working through the grief of not having a biological child is not an easy task. “Do you want my kids?” Don’t be surprised if they answer, “yes.” “Whose fault is it?” Ouch, again. This question is extremely intrusive and can be very hurtful. Depending on the couple’s situation, this can bring up feelings of shame. “‘So and so’ had infertility and then had (insert number here) kids!” We know you are trying to be encouraging, but like many of the other comments, it makes one’s stress feel invalidated. So, what should you say? Luckily, there are just three simple phrases to remember that work in almost every situation. “That sounds (pick a word… ‘frustrating,’ ‘stressful,’ ‘difficult’).” Simply saying this can help a person feel so validated and like someone is listening to them. You are letting them know their feelings are valid and being heard. To someone struggling with infertility, having this support is so comforting. Even if you don’t understand how it feels to struggle with family building, you can let them know you care with this simple statement. “What can I do to be helpful/supportive?” This can mean a lot to a couple because you are asking for their input on what they need, and not trying to give unsolicited advice. Many times they won’t know what you can do, but having someone ask can make all the difference. “You’re not alone, I’m here whenever you need someone to listen.” Infertility can be one of the most lonely, isolating journeys a person goes through. Knowing there are those who love and support them no matter what goes a long way! And having someone who will just listen to their fears and frustrations brings the loneliness down a notch. Thanks for taking time to read through these, we hope these suggestions are helpful to you and your loved ones.

We are so excited for our upcoming infertility conference! Are you curious about what great things await you as a conference guest? Let us tell you all about what great things we have in store this year.... An amazing keynote speaker! This year we have Chad Hymas as our keynote speaker. Chad was in a farming accident in his 20’s that left him a quadrapeligic, but rather than dwell on the negative, he turned his focus on rising above his pain and helping others find joy in the life they are living. Chad is a world renowned speaker, an inspiration to everyone who meets him, and an adoptive father. This is a speaker you won’t want to miss. Many thanks to our keynote sponsor, Utah Center for Reproductive Medicine. Wonderful classes! We know there are many aspects of infertility and treatments and we focus on having something for everyone at this conference. Some of the sessions this year will include: moving on to 3rd party reproduction, all about adoption, infertility 101, resiliency during infertility treatments, how to be a good self advocate, mercier therapy and pelvic movement, secondary infertility, holistic healing panel, journaling, mindfulness, sex and infertility, and MORE! Plus we will have a panel of individuals who have had a wide array of personal experiences that will discuss their journey’s during our lunch. Vendors from across the state! You will have a chance to meet with a variety of vendors including all of the SART certified clinics in Utah, adoption specialists, non profits, holistic practitioners, and more. This is a great way to get to know about the options available to you! GIVEAWAYS! Everyone loves giveaways and we love helping YOU win awesome prizes from our vendors. Past giveaways have included treatment vouchers from clinics, a homestudy, legal consult vouchers, date night baskets, self care baskets, and so much more. We love working with our sponsors to give away fantastic prizes. Support! One thing that almost every conference attendee has mentioned was the incredible feeling of unity that comes from attending the conference. Knowing that you are not alone in your infertility journey, learning about resources, and the chance to meet many friends who are on similar paths is one amazing benefit of the conference. One of last year’s attendees said “Thank you so much for this conference! It has been amazing to get all of this information. I have more hope moving forward” We can’t wait to see you at this year’s conference! None of this would be possible without our amazing sponsors: Platinum Level sponsor: Utah Fertility Center; Gold Level Sponsors: Reproductive Care Center and California Cryobank; Silver Level Sponsors: Conceptions, Nichols Photo Lab, Utah Adoption Specialists, Valley Women’s Health, EMD Serono, Davenport Law; Bronze Level Sponsors: AJ Body Work, Basset Design, Delivering Dreams Surrogacy, Ferring Pharmaceuticals, Harmony Acupuncture, Kirton Mc Conkie, LRB Family Law, New Beginnings, and The Healing Group; Non Profit Plus Sponsors:Children’s Service Society, Hope for Fertility, Intermountain Fertility Care Services, and Utah Foster Care; and our Non Profit Affiliate sponsor: Forever Bound. #InfertilityConference #InfertilityServices #Events

A diagnosis of infertility can feel completely overwhelming. It is hard to think of anything beyond the immediate next steps of all the procedures and diagnostics. Here are some ways for you to care for yourself and cope through treatments. 1. Find Your Tribe! Support Groups, an online community, and good friends are all great resources. Having other women and men who have been through the struggle will help you know you are not alone. We have wonderful support groups across the state of Utah, you can find the one nearest you HERE. 2. Self Care. It is so easy to get caught up in all of the TIME and MONEY that goes into making a baby that we can often forget about our own needs. Take time to care for yourself. Do activities that fill your bucket, journal, exercise, go out with friends, meditate, take time alone, get a pedicure, see a therapist...whatever helps YOU. 3. Ask for help! Infertility can be just as traumatic as other life altering events such as a cancer diagnosis. There is nothing wrong with getting help from a therapist who specializes in infertility. If you live in Utah the UIRC therapists see clients on a sliding fee scale so that EVERYONE can afford to get the mental health care they need. 4. Take things one step at a time! Looking ahead to every option, IVF, egg donors, shots, adoption, home studies...etc. can feel completely overwhelming. Take a breath and remember that you are only fighting today’s battle today. One step at a time you WILL get through this. Setting up an educational consult can also help to bring down the anxiety by understanding your options. 5. Connect with your partner. Remember when sex used to be fun? Remember when you went on dates and didn’t talk about infertility? It is time to recapture some of those things with conscious effort. Take infertility off the table for discussion during date night one evening. Let physical connection, romance, and fun take center stage during intimacy. Focus on the things you love about one another, avoid getting caught in the blame game of infertility being someone’s “fault” and conquer your battle as a team. 6. Find your passion. It is easy to let every spare moment be filled with thoughts of making a baby, but that can be emotionally draining. What are you passionate about? What do you love to do? Do you love reading, art, music, dance, or food? Do you like rock climbing, biking, drawing, or swimming? Remember what you love or seek to develop new interests. Infertility does not define you and is just one aspect of your life, not the defining aspect. 7. Be healthy. A healthy diet and regular exercise will enhance your fertility, but, did you know that those things can also improve your mental health? Staying active and seeking to maintain a balanced diet can give you better tools to combat infertility both physically and mentally. 8. Look for a healthy outlet for your emotions. Many individuals find journaling, a social media account dedicated to documenting their journey, art therapy, yoga, meditation, or blogging a helpful way to release or cope with the negative emotions surrounding their infertility diagnosis. 9. Be honest about your feelings. There are times when it seems easier to say to ourselves that we are fine even though we are really not fine. Honestly acknowledging your pain can help you find healthy ways to move through it. 10. Be optimistic but realistic. It is a wonderful thing to maintain hope, but, it is important to be honest with ourselves and our partners about our diagnosis and treatment plans. Facing plans with honesty allows us to move forward in a healthy way. Most importantly know you are not alone! One in eight individuals will struggle with infertility and all of the feelings that accompany that diagnosis. We hope that these suggestions help you as you move through your journey to grow your family. #Advice #CopingSkills #InfertilityServices

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We have partnered with Owlet and Share Parents Utah for a special program for survivors of infertility, pregnancy loss, or infant loss. We understand that the mental and emotional battle scars of infertility do not disappear with conception, childbirth, or adoption. One struggle that many of us face after we survive infertility or loss is an increase of fear and anxiety surrounding our new child. It sometimes feels impossible to enjoy the new addition because we constantly worry that the child we have so longed for will be taken away.  Another hurdle that some infertility survivors may face can be premature birth or childbirth complications. The amazing people at Owlet recognize these unique challenges faced by our community and have generously donated 18 baby monitors to be given to families who have struggled with infertility, pregnancy loss, or infant loss. UIRC, together with Share Parents, is facilitating the disbursement of this donation. To enter for a chance to be selected, fill out this GOOGLE FORM by January 20 at midnight. A random drawing will take place on January 21st to select the recipients. UIRC and Share Parents will be presenting the selected families with the socks and facilitating the Owlet training program on January 31st at Meet Me on 33rd. #Giveaway #InfertilityServices #Owlet #ShareParents

Written by Mandy Nielsen, Marketing Director Today I want to share some tips for setting goals while dealing with infertility.  I have always found that New Years is often harder than Christmas while in the thick of infertility. Another year passing reminds me that the main goal I have wanted for so long remains out of reach, and there is no certainty what the coming year will bring either.  Combine all of this with the endless social media posts about new additions and magical goals and it is enough to make anyone feel defeated. This year, take having a baby off of your goal/resolution list. It can still be something you work for, but, we all know it is something that is out of our control, so, let's talk about setting goals that are within our control. Here are 5 keys to setting manageable resolutions: 1. Set a resolution that is WITHIN YOUR CONTROL. You cannot control the outcome of an IUI or IVF cycle, if a birth parent chooses you for placement, or winning the lottery (although if you figure this one out, let me know...). Those things are all out of your control.  Shift your thinking around those goals into things that you CAN control and that fit the next 4 criteria. 2. Be SPECIFIC. You've decided to move onto adoption this year, and the tempting thing to put is "adopt a baby" but, that isn't in your control.  So, you change it to "get ready to be awesome parents so a birth mom will choose us"...hmmmm...better..but not quite right.  Now comes the key to step two, be SPECIFIC.  Here are some examples of specific goals:  schedule a consult with UIRC about adoption, attend an adoption event, learn about creating an adoption profile, create an adoption page... 3. Set a TIMELINE and WRITE IT DOWN. Now that you have your specific and controllable goals, set a time frame to achieve them. Let's start with one from our list, schedule an adoption consult. Pick a reasonable time frame for this goal, such as, by February 14th.  Then, WRITE DOWN your goal on your calendar and set some reminders for yourself on your phone. 4. DON'T BEAT YOURSELF UP! Changes and challenges and setbacks happen. Don't throw out your goals when things don't go the way you planned, take a breath, regroup, restart. For example, let's say that you made the goal to only have dessert once a week in an effort to get healthy for IVF...but then it is your best friend's birthday, a party at work, and your period starts all in one week. And you have multiple desserts a day. Don't waste time beating yourself up, just take a breath and decide if you want to try again. If you do, just start fresh. I always channel my inner Anne Shirley from Anne of Green Gables..."Tomorrow is always fresh with no mistakes in it" 5. Find SUPPORT. Goals, especially ones that are life changing, and ones that are emotional (hello every infertility goal!) are best met when you have help. Utilize the support systems available. Attend one of UIRC's in person support groups, meet with a therapist (like the sliding fee scale therapists available from UIRC), talk to a friend, post your goal on social media or in our online support group.  We are HERE for you and want to help you meet your goals on your family building journey. So this week, when you are bombarded by all the things you can't do or can't control, I hope you look for the things you CAN do next year, because there are so many great goals you can set and reach in 2019.  Goals that can create a better present and a better future. #MandyNielsen #Advice #CopingSkills #NewYearsResolution

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UIRC is pleased to to host The ART of Infertility here in Salt Lake in two months. Together, we are presenting a month-long art exhibit and a fundraiser gala. We have invited their founders, Elizabeth and Maria, to share a post here about their mission. What is The ART of Infertility (ART of IF)? The ART of Infertility is an international arts organization started by the two of us, Elizabeth Walker and Maria Novotny, in 2014. The organization conducts art and writing workshops, collects and distributes oral history interviews, curates art exhibitions, and presents educational talks and writings. All of these activities are designed to support the infertile community, provide educational resources, and support further understanding of the topic of infertility in conjunction with arts-based methods of healing. What are the goals of ART of IF? We have both been bothered by the fact infertility stories are often silenced. We’re even more bothered by the fact that there’s not much variety in the stories that are brought to light. It is too-often that infertility is represented within a heteronormative, white, middle-class narrative. The reality is that this is simply not a true nor realistic representation of infertility. As an organization, The ART of Infertility recognizes the diverse voices and perspectives that represent infertility — ranging from those in a heterosexual relationship who receive an infertility diagnosis upon trying to conceive, those who identify as single-mothers-by-choice and undergoing fertility treatment to become pregnant, even those who identify as LGBTQ and encounter many of the same infertility decisions. It’s our mission to expand the narratives of infertility – both in regards to demographics and notions of success. When diagnosed with infertility, how we create and define a family typically falls outside of the norm. This project seeks to make these alternative family-building practices, whether that is having success creating a child or success redefining oneself as a family of two, visible and better understood by all. How did ART of IF start? Elizabeth: A couple years into dealing with infertility, I felt like I needed something tangible to represent how it was impacting me. So, I started creating artwork around my experience. At first it was just an outlet for me, but I soon found that it helped me talk to my friends and family about what I was dealing with. I thought it might help those in my community learn about infertility and approached an art and history museum in my hometown, the Ella Sharp Museum, about allowing me to curate an infertility art exhibit. They said yes, and the first exhibit, The ART of IF: Navigating the Journey of Infertility, opened in March of 2014. I met Maria shortly after. How did the two of you meet? We met while representing the State of Michigan during Infertility Advocacy Day in Washington, D.C. in May of 2014. The two of us were both running infertility support groups, just on opposite ends of the state. In D.C., we ended up spending the day together talking to our local Michigan representatives. Walking from meeting to meeting, we shared how infertility was shaping not just our personal lives but professional ones as well. Maria explained that she was studying the language, rhetoric, and oral histories of infertility as part of her dissertation at Michigan State University. Elizabeth described her desire to continue the exhibit, seeking to expand its collection of artwork and stories by displaying the exhibit around the country. We also talked about how neither of us were in the process of actively trying to build a family. Elizabeth was on a break from treatment. Maria was on a break from deciding how she would build her family. The two of us both felt in need of a “support group for support group leaders” so we started meeting over dinner. Dinners about our support groups soon started into conversations about how we both wanted to continue collecting infertility stories. Eventually, we decided to use Maria’s oral history experience and Elizabeth’s visual art experience to create ART of IF. What was that experience like for you? Elizabeth: Meeting Maria, I felt like I was meeting a long-lost sister or a younger version of myself. I also felt validated in the decisions I had made about my infertility treatment and family building plans when I met someone who, like me, wasn’t necessarily following the path most traveled on the way to building her family through infertility. Maria: When I met Elizabeth, I didn’t realize how badly I needed an infertility girlfriend in my life. I was one of the few who brought her husband to D.C. that year, and he came because he was my closest friend during my infertility journey. Spending the day with Elizabeth, though, I began to see the value of having another friend who was also running a support group and interested in telling infertility stories. At the time, I think that I really underestimated how Elizabeth was going to change my life. But, I am so thankful for it. Today, we call each other “Barren Besties”. Where has the project been exhibited? We’ve now held exhibits, workshops, and presentations in Arizona, California, Illinois, Iowa, Massachusetts, Michigan, New Jersey, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Texas, Utah, Washington State and Washington, D.C. We’ve curated artwork and conducted interviews from across the U.S. and the world. We also did our first international exhibit in Switzerland in fall of 2016. In addition to Utah, we plan to be in Madison, WI, Detroit, Los Angeles, and Chicago in 2018. What can people expect if they come to an exhibit? Those attending our exhibits will find a safe space where they will view local, national, and international artwork in a variety of mediums. All of the artwork is accompanied by narratives from the artists in the form of written exhibit labels and, in some cases, audio and video files. Our goal is always to share a diverse range of infertility patients and experiences. We hope that when people come to the exhibit that they view it as a chance to begin a conversation about what it means to experience reproductive loss. What’s a favorite piece of yours? Maria: Selections of “Infertility is the Worst”. These illustrations by Kelly Zechmeister-Smith always touch me. They are funny yet honest. What I appreciate the most about them is that they show the viewer the everyday struggles of living in an infertile body. From going to the grocery story in the middle of the day to answering what is perceived as an innocent question from a neighbor if you are pregnant. These are the stories of infertility that are so often missed and not seen. I think her pieces really help provoke viewers to think twice about the assumptions that we can all have children easily. Elizabeth: One of my favorite pieces is one we just received this spring. It’s entitled “no. 16” and is by Nancy Fleischman. The piece incorporates porcelain casts of medication packages with medical illustrations etched in glass. I love how the fine detail of the piece naturally invites people to get close to it to get a better view, allowing for an intimate moment with the art and with Nancy’s story. What has the impact been on others? We hope that The ART of Infertility has allowed those with infertility a sense of community and a safe space for creative outlet. That it’s given those with infertility a louder voice, and helped them feel less alone. What has the impact been on us? Elizabeth: ART of IF has helped me make meaning out of my infertility experience. It’s helped me process my own grief and allowed me to create something when I couldn’t create a baby. It’s also connected me to a network of new friends and colleagues across the world. I’m so grateful for all of them, but would likely have never known them if I had been able to conceive. I truly feel lucky every day that I’m in a position to collect and share these stories through art and so thankful for those who entrust their stories with us. Maria: ART of IF has allowed me a safe space to take time and reflect on my infertility journey. In many ways, I have had this unique chance to listen and learn about a range of infertility experiences. Hearing other stories, and having people share how special they have found the project, has reminded me that even if I never have a child of my own -- I am still touching lives and, hopefully, taking steps to create a more infertility-friendly world. What are you looking forward to in Salt Lake City? Elizabeth: This has been in the works for quite awhile and it’s been great working with Camille Hawkins, Executive Director of Utah Infertility Resource Center, and seeing her organization grow along the way and seeing all the ways that UIRC has been able to help those with infertility in Utah. I’m really excited to see everything come together. I’m also interested in learning more about how the Mormon religion and culture in Utah impacts the family building decisions that those with infertility in the community make. It will be great to explore Salt Lake City and make new friends. Maria: This exhibit is a bit different compared to others in the past. This is because we are pairing some infertility patients with professional artists to create representations of their infertility journey. I think that I’m really looking forward to seeing how these two perspectives, hence the name Arches in Perspective, will come together. What an exciting opportunity! Have you had success? As we stated above, we have come to see many types of success resulting from infertility. For example, even though the two of us do not have any children, we still consider ourselves to be successful. Maria defines success as being a family of four, of which two have paws, while Elizabeth has found a sense of success in the ways that she has worked with Maria to help build community, a form of family, through ART of IF. #ArtofInfertility #Events #CopingSkills #Interview

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